This is Your War
by quietEavesdropper
Summary: A month after staying with the Egberts has gone downhill for Karkat. The lingering thoughts of his incident won't leave. Not to mention that somebody has shown up. Slight AU. Many pairings.
1. Chapter 1

**Warnings: Will contain blood, potential gore, eventual romance, swears, and all kinds of things.**

**Notes: Well hi… I don't have much to say. e_e Just. Enjoy my not so good writing. Also this is dedicated to my friend AJ(who is a butt)**

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><p>"<em>Please<em> listen to me!" Wrapping his arms around the troll's waist the human looked up worriedly. It'd only been a month since Karkat had started living here and already things were getting worse. "Stop!" he screamed loudly as the other kept fighting to get him off. John and his father had done what they could to try to help ease him back into society. "Hey," he growled when there was a soft punch to his face. It was difficult considering what had happened just a couple months ago. "Fuck!" The troll had wriggled free and was desperately trying to get to the window. This happened at least two times a week, these panic attacks. "Karkat calm down." Leaping for Karkat once more he managed to bring him to the floor this time.

The panic in the trolls face was obvious. It was coursing through his veins with each small movement that the human restraining him from getting away. There wasn't much he could do at the moment either as Egbert had finally pinned him down so he couldn't move at all. Instead he started shaking and surrendered at last. His nerves weren't about to calm down just yet but he gave up trying to escape.

John sighed and reached out to gently touch his face. "See? It's okay." By now this had become usual and the human considered himself a professional at this. Then again it filled him with worry and concern each time this happened to his friend. Dave would help him out whenever he could but those two didn't always get along too well. Noticing there was a tear that slipped away he wiped it with his thumb. "Shhh… it's okay Karkat. It's okay. You're just fine."

Instead of calming down the troll just closed his eyes and tried to avoid looking at John. "J-jo-"

"Shoosh." He papped his cheek and smiled. "I know, I know. You're sorry. Don't worry about it," he reassured him before slowly scooting off of him. He kept close to his friend however in case this wasn't the end of the attack. "What triggered it this time?" he asked softly.

Karkat just curled into a ball and cried into his knees, remaining there on the floor to sob quietly. After a few minutes of laying there he held out a hand. The best friend took it in his own, knowing that he just wanted comfort. At least John had patience with him by now. "Come on, tell me," he urged him to explain the situation this time.

"John… I-I-, " he gasped for air and squeezed his eyes tighter together. "I saw…" Feeling a hand running through his hair and the thumb on the back of his hand he shuddered and whimpered.

"You saw what?" he cooed trying to slowly pull out the answer. The thumb continued to run across the back of the gray hand. John was sure he knew what this troll had seen but it didn't hurt to confirm it and attempt to avoid it for next time, right?

"I sa- saw that f-fucking r-red bl-" he cut himself off already but that was enough.

That was all John needed to hear. Reaching over he picked Karkat up in both of his arms. Egbert knew exactly what had happened. As he stood with the troll clinging to him and still weeping softly he sighed. "It's okay, I understand. Your safe now though, let go of it." As much as he wished this would be a simpler thing to do than say for the crabby bitch in his arms that was near impossible at the moment.

Glancing about the room with those clear blue eyes he spotted the cause of all this mess. Both of them had decided to go ahead and try out crafts. Sadly the scissors had nicked the soft gray finger and just the sight of blood always sent Karkat into a panic.

"Come on, let's get that fixed up. I'm sure dad will be home soon too." That was a lie. His dad was on a business trip. He said that to make them both feel better. Although Dave and his brother Dirk would come help out with house-sitting, which really meant they needed to check in on their resident troll and make sure he hadn't managed to slip away.

The derp heard a soft little cough and looked back down at Karkat who was starting to gain control of himself once again. "John?" he sputtered in a surprisingly clear voice.

"Yes Kar?" he answered and adjusted his hold on the troll.

"You lied… again," he stated clearly to make sure that his best friend knew he knew.

A false smile danced on the pink lips of the human. "What are you talking about?" He gave a nervous laugh which seemed to strengthen the resolve of the troll.

"Why?"

"Huh?"

"Tell me why you keep lying to me, now." The troll had loosened his grip and wasn't even looked up. Instead he was still wiping away the stupid red tears he hated so much.

"Listen Karkat I'm not lying-"

"_Tell me_," he pleaded.

"Look I'm bei-"

"Tell me _god dammit_," he demanded and let go of the shirt all together.

John was quiet for a moment, processing all of this in his head for a good long minute that seemed to only infuriate the troll even more than usual. "Karat, before you say anything, I just want you to know I'm doing the best I can do here."

Setting down the small figure on the counter he retrieved the aid kit. The human medicine didn't work on Karkat but the bandages were fine enough. Lucky for them the damned brat hadn't gotten sick on them just yet. Not sure how that was going to work. Taking a bandaid he wrapped the finger up tightly and kissed it softly.

Pulling up a stool he sat down himself and crossed his arms on the table so that he could lay his head down. "I don't know to be honest with you."

"Oh." That was the only response he got.

"But! But I just want to keep you safe and I guess…. I slip in lies because that way you don't have to deal with the pain." There was that nervous laugh again.

No response came from the other. As Egbert was about to speak again he looked up just in time to catch the troll from falling off the counter. Well he'd passed out. Probably worked himself up to the point of conking out once again.

Smiling he shook his head. What was he going to do with this mess? At least he knew this probably wouldn't happen for at least three more days, which meant the crabby and cranky Mr. Vantas would be back.

It would never be the same though. After all that had happened… it just wasn't going to be the same.


	2. Chapter 2

John had set Vantas up in his bed once again. Stupid troll always had nightmares though. He'd mentioned weird cocoons that were like beds once and how they had sopor slime to calm the dreams. Every single time he woke him up from those screeching and blood sweating nightmares he casually passed it off like nothing was wrong with it. Right afterwards he'd turn over and try to fall asleep again. It was fucking confusing as the grump refused to share anything about what had happened with Egbert.

He let out a sigh before standing to head back downstairs. There was no point in hanging around to listen to the screams and pain. It always sounded like a murder was happening. Despite this John was curious to know what those dreams were about, not that he ever planned to ask.

Getting an idea for a new prank, to pull on the cranky crab, he started off downstairs attempting to contain his fit of giggles. Buckets. He knew what they meant and it tickled him silly every time Karkat got all flustered about it. Honestly the troll couldn't flip more tables at any other time. Only this time he was going to fill it with candy corn, another thing that made Karkat flip shit.

He thought back to when he first bought a bag of candy corn because they reminded him of the horns on Karkat's head. It was quite funny giving him the bag and watching him shake with confusion. Horns were apparently sensitive and were not for touching, as the troll was dead set on saying. Even so when John ate a few it set him off and seemed to make him squirm.

This prank was going to be perfect. The trickster was at it again. These little pranks did seem to cheer Vantas up a little; even if it wasn't a lot it was better than nothing.

Finding the bucket in the kitchen closet he dragged it to the table. Pulling it onto the table he decided to first clean it up and make it sparkle with miracles. Now he needed to head upstairs to find the bathroom and the other cleaning supplies. The way his dad organized this house was a wacky set up. It was all fine and dandy to him but even so it was something he did question.

John proceeded to get a scrub and a decent looking soapy cleaning thing. Not even paying attention to the brand or label he made his way back downstairs, hoping he wasn't going to wake up the troll. It would be a hassle to get him to fall back asleep and then he'd have to explain the cleaning supplies, which also seemed to upset Karkat, then there was the bucket and hell it'd be a mess.

Pushing past the thoughts as he sat down to get to work on the bucket he smiled to himself. It would be just fine, everything would fine. Completely fine. There was no need to keep worrying all the time. Eventually there would be nobody there for the crab and it'd be fine. Nothing would happen and everyone would survive and move on in life. All he needed to do was keep up his strong front and nobody would worry about him, which was unnecessary.

Shit. He only had a single bag of candy corn left. Dad wouldn't be home until late either. He'd worry about that later, for now he needed to clean up this bucket to be spiffy and sparkly. Otherwise this prank wouldn't be nearly as cool. If he could just do a few other things that irked Karkat as well this would be the best. He'd have to ask Dave after this.

He scrubbed down the bucket to the last speck of dirt before it had a nice shiny reflection and John could see himself in the bucket's side. Yep. This was definitely squeaky clean. A ribbon! Yes, a nice bright red ribbon just for Karkat. Giggling like an idiot for a minute or two he grinned slyly before finding his phone. It was time to message the asshole.

"heeeeey Dave!"

"im guessing you need my expert abilities at throwing down sick fires in order to piss off a certain somebody"

"no. not at all."

There wasn't a response for a good long minute so John opened up the candy corn and poured it into the bucket.

"so then jonathan im curious to know what prank you have stuffed in that bag of mysteries and glory this time"

"what? dave how'd you know?"

"bro im like your best fucking friend"

"whatever Dave! fine I don't need your help."

He let out a small huff and looked into the bucket, definitely needed to stop by the store. Sighing he slipped off the stool, hoping he could just find some ribbon around this place. The cell in his hand started to buzz and light up again.

"whoa whoa whoa little man if you need help you can always call on the davemeister"

"you sure?"

"of course now what is it that you need from the pro coolkid?"

"ugh, you're such an ass sometimes. what I needed was some advice on what else to add to my latest master prank."

"against karkat right"

"yes"

"huh alright well you coming to me for my highly extensive knowledge on tomfoolery certainly is unexpected today so im going to sit here and relish this moment"

"DAAAAAAVE!"

"alright chill bro ill help you out this time just meet me at the corner store in half an hour"

"what? well okay then."

"catch your fat ass later then"

"DAVE!"

"later"

"ugh, later"

What an asshat. Always pushing buttons at every single opportunity he was given. Then again John figured it was all in good fun and it wasn't intentionally meant to sting, or maybe it was in some stupidly ironic way.

John knew that the walk to the corner store took twenty minutes, which left him ten to make sure he wouldn't freeze outside. Winter was a harsh time of year here and it only made everyone grumpy. Actually it had yet to snow, but Egbert was looking forward to seeing Karkat's face when he first saw the white specks falling from the sky. The weather man predicted it would snow tonight, which meant shoveling snow in the morning and explaining more "human" things to the troll. He'd apparently never been this cold either because anytime John went to check on him or they went outside he was shivering like some little yapping Chihuahua.

Oh right! He needed to go find his jacket and scarf. His scarf was strung across the back of the couch so that was a quick swing before it was around his neck. John glanced around, wondering where he'd stowed his jacket this time. Every time he came home he just chucked it somewhere. Sometimes his dad would move it or hang it up to try to teach him to take care of his things. It didn't work, he didn't care.

It took another few minutes of looking before he found it tucked into another jacket in the closet. His dad was always pulling these tricks on him, and they were getting a bit out of hand. Slipping on his coat he smiled to himself and hugged himself to just feel how soft it was. Alright so considering his dad bought this for him last Christmas it was definitely worth trying to find every time. Not to mention it was in impeccable condition.

John rolled up his sleeve to check his watch and swore bitterly. He should have left a few minutes ago. Dammit! Grabbing his wallet as he bolted to the door he made sure to not knock over the bucket of candy corn. It'd be such a waste of the delicious candy. It was sad it was harder to find as the year came away from Halloween. Well, if Karkat was in a pissy mood he'd probably dump the bucket out either way, but it had to be good for the prank. Everything needed to be just right.

There was only a matter of time now before Dave called and badgered him about being the slowest poke there ever was, or something ridiculous like that. Even if he didn't John knew he'd get an earful from his best friend when he got there, even if just one second late.

It was a brisk cold walk to the store, but Egbert was more focused on not being late. His soft jacket kept him warm enough after all. Nothing else was really needed just yet, well his scarf also helped keep his neck and face from becoming chilly. It was a fleece scarf from his dad and even though it was a sky blue color he loved it.

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><p><strong>Sorry for taking so long on this chapter. Been feeling gross. <strong>


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